I’ve never really been one to label things as a “journey”; I’ve always thought everything is just one experience that leads to another. However, becoming a mother has changed that. Postpartum is no joke. This transition into a new “normal” has been nothing short of the most challenging, most beautiful time of my life.
We are almost three months into this postpartum journey, and I still can’t wrap my head around it. Then again, I find it hard to wrap my head around a lot of things at the moment (hello, sleep deprivation). We’ve created this tiny human, and with him he has brought so much chaos and sheer joy.
I would say I am loving every minute of it, but there are most definitely moments that I don’t love. Life is messy, and parenthood is the same. So to say that every moment is pure bliss is a lie. That being said, there are so many moments that are pure bliss. The good outweighs the bad, hands down, every. single. day.
These past few months have amazed me. What my body went through, and continues to go through every single day, amazes me. The postpartum body really is amazing. Less than 3 weeks after I had given birth, my body was pretty much back to what it was before I got pregnant. Mind you, my tummy is a bit…softer. And I have stretch marks on my boobs. But I am in awe of how resilient my body is. There are moments where I still feel like this body isn’t mine. But I try my best to accept these physical changes with grace.
Learning how to live with Aidan is hard. I won’t lie, there are moments where I doubt literally everything I’m doing; there are moments where I feel like there’s no breathing room because he won’t nap and I just want five minutes to myself. As hard as everything is, I keep telling myself that this will pass. I’ll miss the constant snuggles and him wanting me all of the time. So for now I accept that I won’t be able to do the things I used to; not just yet. I take breaks when I can, and I ask for help…well, I’m learning to at least. The most important thing that you can ask for during this time is for help. Because I know I can’t take care of Aidan if I don’t take care of myself.
I soak in every little thing that I can. I spend so much time just staring at him, trying to memorize every little thing about his face (when memory fails, the 5397535 photos on my camera roll should do the trick). I sit and watch him grab my hands when he’s tired and it makes my heart feel like it’s going to burst. So yes, postpartum is a difficult time. But it is also so, so, beautiful.
xx Lauren
